What to do when feeling really lonely.

lonelyQuestion: Everytime I think of my younger days with my father I feel very lonely and depressed. Could you help me? how? Don’t tell me to jump over the building coz i might as well.

ANSWER:

All of us feel lonely at one time or another. You were too attached to your father and this is the most natural thing. You loved him immensely because he has been a source of love, protection, encouragement and companionship for you. You miss him because that love you got was unconditional. There were no terms. It was so very natural and it was there all the time. In later life we tend to roam away from our lives and we think we are progressing. We need time to look around and looking back tells us we don’t have anybody just for us. Human relationship is very complex and complicated. No, you are not jumping over a building but you are not going to be alone. Find a friend with whom you can talk/ share on 24/7 basis. This harrowing feeling I do understand eats our hearts and renders us helpless. Of course help is there but you have to pull yourself together. Mourning and grief can get really prolonged. Nobody is saying that you should forget your dad. But imagine what he would feel if he sees you in this despair? Please note that its our bodies which die, our souls don’t. We feel when we pass away and we are near our loved ones. When they are hurt we feel more hurt. I am sure you wouldn’t like to make your dad feel bad and start to take interest in small things around you. Write to me. Write to other friends you already know. They can be the key to the road to happiness. Loneliness takes time to disappear and you will have to keep trying by diverting your attention to other things. Start a social activity. Help others in need, you will be rewarded so soon and the response will be so overwhelming that you will find yourself crying out of gratitude. Is there a doctor near you? Why not consult him. Your condition might also benefit from professional help.

From:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AhrAALaBe0ZzJj.5mhF8.3Xty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=1006052331932&show=7#profile-info-AA12172175

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About Dr. Afaq Ahmad Qureshi

Physician, writer, broadcaster, journalist, translator, free lance writer, poet, political and social analyst and critic. Writes plays and features for electronic media, interested in numerous things from sociology to medicine to history and art. interest in books and internet, writes for http://www.blogcritic.com also; editor for Internet journal; at http://twitter.com; had so many traumatic experiences blah blah blah...
This entry was posted in Grief, Love, relationships, suicide and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

6 Responses to What to do when feeling really lonely.

  1. AISHA says:

    JUST THINK WHAT THE UNIVERSE IS??? OR DO SOMETHING UNIQUE ONLY FOR YOUR SELF

  2. afaq says:

    Dear Neeraj Sharma,

    you should talk to the lady and clear this issue. Maybe she is just busy in her office. Say what you feel.

  3. afaq says:

    It was a situation in which somebody asked a specific question. The answer therefore should not be taken as the ‘standard management’ of grief. As for wonderful management programs; I have my reservations about them but I do admit their utility in a vast number of cases.

  4. Carr says:

    You lost me after the line, “You were too attached to your father…”
    Grief can be a lonely place sometimes, but to tell someone they were too attached to someone they cared for is incomprehensible to me. The person who wrote this answer does not sound compassionate. “Pull yourself together” “Mourning and grief can get really prolonged.” There is no road map for the journey through grief. There is never a clear sign that says, “You are healed. Take the next exit.” There are wonderful programs that can help you understand your grief and help you not feel so alone, but we each have our own path to take and some days the grief washes over us harder than others.
    Be kind to yourself.

  5. NEERAJ says:

    DEAR SIR,

    I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND. PAST DAYS WE LIVE HAPPY TOGTHER. BUT NOW A DAYS SHE JOINED THE OFFICE AND SHE IGNORE ME. I FEEL SHE LOVES SOMEBODY ELSE MAN IN OFFICE.

    PLEASE HELP ME. WHAT CAN I DO. I FEEL SO DEPRESSED AND LONELY.

    NEERAJ SHARMA

  6. marielsgarden says:

    Thanks for posting this. I really needed this tonight. Take care.

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